maybe some times i wonder why life is so unpredictable and so stupid.. maybe sometimes i wish i had wings and i wish i could fly around the globe whenever i wanted.. maybe always i want to hide my feelings and i want to "be happy" for the world. Maybe i don't like Amerika..maybe i dont even like Macedonia, but who cares?
Maybe i want to cry and i maybe i want to laugh ..most of all i dont want to feel. i dont want feelings, i want to be cold with the world. i want.. i don t know what i want actually. Love? I have, but is far away.. Family? i kind of have, but is far away.. Friends? I have them too, but they are far away also.. Great school? Ahh, i have it here, and guess what.. i dont want to take advantage of it.. i dont want to study.. Then why i am here? To have fun? Maybe.. Maybe i dont feel need to have fun..
Is this homesickness? is it just wish to have power to change life? is it just stupid idea of me being perfect in a world where that's impossible...
I dont know.. I just know that i will go in my room, take a shower and go out to walk.. At least this city offers me great nature and chance to chill out my head and my thinking .. I will miss this city one day.. I know i will...
